Last week the Lord was teaching me about surrender! Phew! That was a tough one! I spent the rest of the week focusing on puppy training and homeschooling, both mentally draining. Isaiah 40:31 "But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength: they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." That summed up my week. So tired, but the Lord gave me the strength to keep going.
Then the big weekend came. The baptism of me and my husband had been in the works for a long time. This was a big deal, and we wanted to honor the Lord with it.
Be sure, when Jesus is exalted, and God is glorified, the evil one will be angry. I was on the hit list, and I wasn't prepared for it. I tend to rush into things without thinking them through. Usually when something big comes up, I'm excited about it until it's actually about to happen, then I panic and back out. That's exactly what happened with the baptism. I've been looking forward to it for months, and the night before, I was tempted to back out.
When I was baptized before, it was in a heated baptistery. Now, I have a cold water phobia, and refuse to get into cold water. I grew up with a pool, and it was the greatest thing when I was a kid. But I don't play games with water. I don't find throwing people people in the pool unexpectedly very amusing. I know that's not what happens with baptism, but for some reason, that's all I could think about. I'm a small person, yet when I get scared, I can wrestle a large man and win. Seriously. I was so nervous about that coming out in front of everyone. Perhaps it was a little bit of hormones, but I believe it was spiritual attacks. Trying to tempt me to not get baptized.
Baptism is a beautiful picture of the lost second half of the gospel. Usually the gospel is preached in America as you are a sinner, God loves you. Jesus died for your sins, was buried and rose again; if you believe that, pray the sinner's prayer and welcome to the family of God. But really, the gospel of the Bible is you are God's enemy, but God loves you even in your wickedness. (Romans 8:7; Romans 5:8) Jesus, the Son of God, died as God's enemy so you could have His perfect sinless record as your own. (Romans 3:25). Jesus died, was buried, and rose again so you can die to yourself, bury your sins, and rise again to live for Him Who died for you. Mark 8:34 "Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it, but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it." 1 Corinthians 15:22 "For as in Adam all die, even so in Christ shall all be made alive." In the Bible, new converts were baptized right away, visualizing the gospel: Because Jesus died, buried, and rose again, I die, bury, and rise again. Galatians 3:27 "For as many of you as have been baptized into Christ have put on Christ." 1 Peter 3:20,21 " Which sometime were disobedient, when once the longsuffering of God waited in the days of Noah, while the ark was a preparing, wherein few, that is, eight souls were saved by water. The like figure whereunto even baptism doth also now save us (not the putting away of the filth of the flesh, but the answer of a good conscience toward God,) by the resurrection of Jesus Christ:" I love baptism. Really, instead of sealing the decision to follow Jesus by a prayer, biblically, we should seal that decision to follow Christ with baptism.
We wanted to get baptized sooner, but it didn't work out that way for us. We finally got the logistics settled, and the day was fast approaching. All I could think about was being thrown in the water. I don't know why, because that's not what was going to happen. But that's the flesh for you, it doesn't make sense. But regardless of being illogical, that's what I was freaking out about. I had great fear of being forced to go in the water. I realized it was a spiritual attack when I started doubting that I needed to get baptized at all, and doubting if I really did just get saved this year when I was following Jesus all along. My husband was great working me through it. I was really ready to postpone it until we could get baptized in a heated pool. But I had this pulling on me that if I backed out of this, then I wasn't really following Jesus, I was really following my own comforts. I wrestled with this all night, and all morning. The baptism was in the afternoon. Finally, I realized, hey, I'm not going to put a stipulation on following Jesus. It's all or nothing. Cold or warm, I'm going to follow Jesus. We were getting ready, and my husband was working on the pool. He checked the chlorine levels, and it was finally low enough to swim in after weeks of being too high. I looked at him and said, I'm jumping in. Right now. I have to. So, I did. It was fine. My fear was blown way out of proportion. Jace jumped in too. I was finally spiritually ready to follow through in believer's baptism.
1 Peter 5:8 "Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walks about, seeking whom he may devour:" 1 Corinthians 10:13 "There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it."
I finally was able to recognize my fear for what it was, the devil trying to scare me away from following Jesus. But I also recognized the escape that Jesus prepared for my moment of temptation: conquering my fears in the pool. Once that happened, the devil had nothing on me anymore. I could stand up boldly, my heart in submission to His mission for me to advance the kingdom of God. Jesus fought for me.
My prayer for you is that you will surrender and follow Jesus, no matter the cost. That you will recognize the devil's attacks and escape in the arms of Jesus, knowing He's got your back.
My prayer for you is that you won't live a life of fear, but that you will live life fearing the right things. Matthew 10:28 "Fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear Him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell." We don't have to fear the devil's attacks, because "You are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world." 1 John 4:4.
Here's some pictures of my husband and me sharing our testimonies and getting baptized.
And no, the water wasn't as cold as I expected it to be ;)
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